Gender, Human Rights, Intersex Awareness, Self-Determination, Transgender

A Penis and a Vagina does not Create our Gender Identity

I like to teach that gender is our personality and that a penis and a vagina does not create our gender identity. We are not assigned our personality, we just become it. Just like becoming left or right handed, or being able to be ambidextrous and use both hands.  We now trust a child to choose if they are left handed, right handed or ambidextrous when they are very young.

This analogy of handedness can be used when an intersex child is born both and even holds true for any child.  It holds true even if they are born with an endosex (not intersex) body.  All children figure out their gender and they do it relatively young and before they even start grade school.

My Thoughts Regarding Intersex Children:

Here is the United Nations’  intersex FACT SHEET.  I believe that genitals, reproductives systems, hormones, and chromosomes will never create our gender identity.

If we just relax and wait, I promise the baby will let the world know.  All of us who were assigned wrong at birth have all proven that no expert, no chromosomal test, no MRI, CatScan or blood test can determine the gender of any of us 100% of the time.   Yes, sometimes surgeries are medically necessary, but most the time they are only cosmetic and have horrible consequences.  This means a lot of errors have been made and permanently so with non-reversible surgeries.   I know too many un-happy intersex people to prove the experiment of assigning our gender surgically has failed miserably and has to stop.  The obvious solution is to wait and let the baby decide their gender.

My Thoughts Regarding Transgender Children: 

If we gave self-determination of gender to all humans, the diagnosis of gender dysphoria and the label ‘transgender’ would vanish too.   It is our culture that has decided what genitals belong to what gender.  Anything outside of that expectation is now called gender dysphoria.  When I feel it is truly a case of cultural dysphoria around genitals and gender.  However, the label transgender is very important to our culture right now, so we have to take on the discrimination that us transgender people face very seriously.

Yet, in the perfect world, if we gave self-determination to everyone, no one would have to transition or be diagnosed to do so.  Birth Certificates would now only take note that a human was born.  My friend, Mo Cortez, Intersex Advocate from Houston, once shared that maybe our blood type could be put on our birth certificate in place of male or female.  Is our gender marker truly necessary on our birth certificate?  Many feel it is not for many reasons.

One last note: Self-Determination is a human right, and only with consensual adults should genital cosmetic corrective surgeries be performed.  No government should dictate that an adult trans person has to have gender confirmation surgeries to validate their identity.  Surgery should remain a personal choice and not a requirement for a transition from one gender to the other.  Sex reassignment surgeries are also a solution for severe forms of gender dysphoria and should always be available to those who require it.  The World Professional Association for Transgender Health (WPATH) states: 

“The medical procedures attendant to sex reassignment are not ‘cosmetic’ or ‘elective’ or for the mere convenience of the patient. These reconstructive procedures are not optional in any meaningful sense, but are understood to be medically necessary for the treatment of the diagnosed condition.”

Back to Intersex Natural Variations: 

Right now intersex variations are diagnosed as medical conditions.  When they are truly just naturally occurring natural bodily variations.  Can you imagine if we gave a diagnosis to male or female?  It is no different.  Intersex is the biological sex of an intersex person.  Just like anyone an intersex baby can grow up to have any gender identity, gender expression or sexual orientation.   Surgeries are not going to keep these things from happening.  Yes, there are going to be gay, lesbian, and transgender appearing intersex kids and people, and the world has to get over itself.

A Gender Self-Determining World: 

If all children were no longer taught that their genitals made them a boy or a girl, and genital integrity was taught early on, wouldn’t this be a better world for intersex, transgender, and non-conforming people?  I believe that ‘no body is shameful’ and that a person can be the personality of any gender:  male, female, both or neither.

I also believe that it is not just intersex kids that need to learn that nobody is shameful.  It is all of us humans, especially transgender children.  Whom I feel are also being coerced to think they need genital surgeries when they grow up.

If everyone was given the self-determination of their gender, we might be very surprised to see a world emerge “gender nonconforming”: 

There are three ways to be a gender non-conformist:

1) Our physical bodies appearing both or neither.  We can be born biologically endosex (not intersex) or intersex.

2) Our Gender identity (our personality as male, female both or neither).

3) Our Gender Expression (how we dress, our hair, or appear to this world).

We can have one, two, or a mixture of these.  As you can see there will be many words and labels that describe all these states of being too.  I hope for a world that can evolve to stop thinking genitals create our gender and we can all just simply be with genital integrity.

Screen Shot 2017-11-14 at 3.45.30 PM

 Fix Society, Please.  

 Helpful Definitions of Human Sexuality


Fix Society with Angel Feather
Hope for a Better World.




Emancipation, Freedom, Human Rights, Intersex Awareness, Self-Determination

Once assigned female: I am very proud to be a little man now!

Sharing my thoughts for today, and something that might surprise you!
Lots of guys might have shame being a shorter stature. According to statistics, a man is “short”, if they come in under 5’7″ in the USA. I am 5’5″! I have absolutely no shame or body dysphoria. I know I am fortunate that way!
So many people with non-conforming bodies and atypical genitals are not so fortunate. Be it if we are born intersex with natural bodily variations, or call ourselves transgender, this world can be a cruel cold place for those of us who have bodies that do not conform to “typical”.  This sometimes creates body dysphoria and gender dysphoria.  If you are wondering what intersex is, please go to this link:  United Nations’ Intersex Fact Sheet.
Being raised the wrong gender, as female, all my life, I have had this obsession with shorter men. More than likely because I was taught at three and four that I was not allowed to be a boy.  It would not be until the last two years of my life that I figured out that I had been lied to!
Starting as a young teen, I even memorized the names of famous, short-statured, male actors and rock stars even!  As an unusual teenager posters of some of these shorter men were tacked onto my pink bedroom walls.   Well, obviously you could see why I had this short man obsession!  Now that I appear a little dude, and legally so!   I am absolutely celebrating my life more!
My entire existence has improved!  I have a life now!  I sadly lived the majority of my life with major depression and being tormented by psychiatry and doctors.  My genuine existence had been completely erased.  Half my life is over now, however, I now have HOPE, and can live my genuine and authentic self now!
I hope my story, along with many other stories, is a lesson learned to all the doctors, psychiatrists, and parents out there.  You can read more about me here. 
We do not need to be fixed! Just let us be, please.  Fix Society Please instead!  
 THREE CHEERS to the Self-Determination of our own Gender and Autonomy! 
Some of my thoughts about the self-determination of gender, that you might be interested in: 
Fix Society I don't have gender dysphoria
Intersex Activist, Questions and Answers

What I believe:


I believe that the Self-Determination of Gender is a human right for all humans.  Gender to me, is like our personality.  It has nothing to do with our genitals, reproductive systems, chromosomes or hormones.  Therefore a woman can have a female penis, and a man can have a man’s vagina.  I also believe that if a person has no genitals, they can identify as any gender, or even have the right to have no gender.

I believe that all humans are born in the right body.  I do not like “born in the wrong body” theories.  It should be up to that individual to declare they feel dysphoric about their body, without society telling them they were born wrong. Gender experts giving out the diagnosis of “Gender Dysphoria” to everyone whose genitals do not fit the expectations of typical male or typical female can be very destructive.  I actually feel it is “cultural dysphoria”, and not “gender dysphoria”.

I believe that genitals, reproductive organs, chromosomes, and hormones do not create gender.  To me, gender is like our personality and a feeling within ourselves.  Again, I believe that some women can have a penis, and some men can have a vagina.  In intersex and transgender people it is fact that some women can have XY chromosomes, and some men can have XX chromosomes.  The presence of a Y chromosomes does not always create a male.

I believe that scientifically the brain can’t accurately be proven to be either male, or female.   Therefore,  also demonstrating that the Self-Determination of gender should be a human right for all humans.  Most science around the “female or male brain” is very bias, and based a social construct of what creates a girl or boy, man or woman.

I believe that no child or infant should be forced non-consensual genital corrective surgery or surgery without informed consent.   Our gender does not reside in the appearance of our genitals and changing our genitals doesn’t magically fix things.  In many cases the surgeries  have proven to cause great harm.  Especially if it happens to an infant or child, I consider corrective surgeries as genital mutilation and torture.

I believe that any well informed, and consenting adult, should have the right to modify their body, or genitals, as they feel it necessary.   However, it is my hope they are conforming due to their own personal needs , and not due to governmental, or societal expectations, or laws,  to “pass” as typical male or female.  I believe that all people, transgender or not, have the right to genital integrity. 

I believe that labels can be as helpful as they can be destructive.  All of us born LGBTQIA+ sometimes have to depend on these labels to declare and explain our different human rights needs.  I feel that the intersex community is very different from the rest of the LGBT experience,  and  my actions prove that I show respect for those who are LGBT.

I believe that some people (cis gender or transgender people), can later discover in life that they have intersex natural bodily variations,  a  difference is sex development, disorder of sexual development, DSD,  any intersex variation, or hormonal variations.   I have helped many into the intersex community to get support.  However, some stories we have heard are medically impossible.   It can do much harm to those of us who are true, when a person creates a tall tale about themselves being born intersex when they are not.  These untruths can harm intersex babies born to this world, and can even create falsehoods that harm all of us intersex people as a whole.

I believe that there is no such thing as the male and female binary system in nature.  However, I totally respect those who want to live as, or conform as, binary male/female. I believe that nature created naturally occurring bodily variations, and sometimes our genitals do not match what society says is male and female, and sometimes our personalities do not match what society says is male or female.

I believe that  gender non-conforming people, like my self, exist and that our human experience is just as valid as those who spend time conforming to male and female rules.  I will always believe that the male and female binary is a social construct.

I believe that the way people dress, cut their hair, desire to appear as, and act as, is truly more like a socialy learned gender performance for all of us.

Imagine What Seven Billion

Fix Society with Angel Feather
Hope for a Better World.


Cosmetic Genital Surgery, Intersex Awareness, Questions and Answers, Transgender, United Nations

The difference between transgender and intersex and the harm that wrong language can bring

Language is very important, and language can do harm. Here is one example to why:

The biggest priority most intersex activist/advocates/educators have, like me, is decreasing genital mutilation in babies born with intersex traits and decreasing our bodies being aborted when detected before birth.

This means “Born in the wrong body” transgender theories, can do us harm. This is one example of why I educate.

I support the message is: “No body is shameful” and “born perfect”. Instead of saying disorder, condition, syndrome, or birth defect.  The United Nations wants us to say: NATURAL BODILY VARIATIONS. I like to say we are born a “variety of human”. I urge anyone who is wanting to speak up for intersex rights to please read and memorize these two pages given by the UNTIED NATIONS: INTERSEX FACT SHEET

Also, Although some intersex born people may accept the word “hermaphrodite”, that word too, can bring stigma, and shame, due to it being connected to a medical history of misinformed doctors who justified fixing our bodies due to some of us being labeled “pseudo hermaphrodite”. Always ask before using this word in public. It is always safest to say: “Intersex Person”.
The words we use to stop genital mutilation and abortions from happening are a vastly different from how most transgender people are being taught or may feel about themselves and their, bodies and their genitals. Most psychiatrists, councilors, and doctors are teaching “born in the wrong body” theories and that transgender people need to “transition” through hormone manipulations and surgery to correct their “body dysphoria”.  Although some transgender people truly have body dysphoria and benefit from treatment, some do not. The same truth holds true for intersex people. Everyone’s experience is unique to their own and generalizations are never a good idea.

Here lies the problem, the medical and psychiatric communities are teaching these theories even to the parents of intersex babies, and children. Even as adults, who discover later in life that we were born intersex are being taught these theories. The harm is horrendous. The set back in our movement is great.

Here lies the biggest difference between transgender and intersex. It is a mountain of misinformation, we are up against when it comes to saving bodies, and lives, so that we can simply be born with “NATURAL BODILY VARIATIONS” and co-exists our true gender in this world with the genitals and bodies we were born with.

An intersex person can have any gender identity, and according to the social construct of gender, it is not always going to “agree” with our genitals. So this means the self-determination of our gender has to be our choice. This choice needs to be a fully informed choice and should be given to any child born intersex. Here are some examples of the different gender identities an intersex person can have: Gender Identity.

To learn more, here is an excellent link regarding the “Basic Differences between Transgender and Intersex“, shared from Oii Australia.

An added note:   Some, but not all transgender people elect to have Sex Reassignment Surgeries (SRS) or Gender Confirmation Surgeries.  This can involve just doing “top surgery”, which involves masculinizing or feminizing one’s chest; or the more involved “bottom surgeries”, that help the person to align with their genitals to the expectations of the male/female binary.  Also, some intersex people, but not all, can also identify as transgender and intersex both.   It is up to the person how they describe themselves, and not up to others to label them or diagnose them.

Sad to say, these types of surgeries are also performed on infants and children, born intersex, and is often called “corrective surgery”.   As you now understand, self-determination is a human right, to what surgery a person may or may not want.  The United Nations says that cosmetic genital surgeries, and corrective surgeries,  need to stop in non-consensual infants and children.  

Related articles: 

Trans Persons Posing as Intersex (and the damage they do to intersex rights)

My related blogs: 

Common names for INTERSEX:  Intersex is what it is….

Why I feel INTERSEX should be added to the LGBTQ rainbow

Am I Transgender? Can an intersex person be Transgender?

How I was medically, and psychiatrically violated as an intersex person.

Are my Husband and I Gay Men Now? How We Became Sexual Minorities, Our Intersex Love Story.

I was born perfect, and I am lovable. Thank you, United Nations.

Examples of Transphobia, Queerphobia, and Intersexphobia


Human Rights, Intersex Awareness, Science, Self-Determination, Transgender

A Male/Female Mosaic Brain Proves We Need the Self-Determination of Gender



People have tried to create the myth that the brain is either male or female.  However, the science around this is very skewed, biased, and is always proven to be not good science at all.  I can see why transgender people, and their doctors, psychiatrists,  psychologist,  would be eager to want to prove the existence of a male or female brain.  Especially since our world has  been told that the genitals of a transgender person supposedly do not match their gender, and that the genitals of some intersex people are supposedly ambiguous and disordered.  Despite all this,  I now realize there might be a better rationale to giving all humans the freedom of picking their own gender.

Recently MRI studies have proven that there are no significant differences between the “male brain” and the “female brain”.  They have proven that the brain is such a mixture, that they can’t tell if the brain is either male or female.   So some say that  the brain is a MOSAIC of both male and female.  You can read references below.  However, I will note, how does anyone know what male and female brain is in the first place. That in itself is an assumption based on the social creation of gender.

Regardless, this is proving, what many, including myself, have said all along.  That Gender is a social construct, and that sex is a social construct.  Let me clarify for those who get gender and sex confused.  Gender is our personality and how we determine ourselves to be male, female or neither.  Sex, has to do with our reproductive system, genitals, hormones and chromosomes.  Both gender and sex have been created by cultural expectations, and thus the “myth” of the male/female binary was created.

It is time to stop Diagnosing those who do not obey this gender and sex social construct: 

From this male/female binary myth, came two diagnosis.  One being: “gender dysphoria”.  A diagnosis often given to people labeled transgender.  It is when they do not obey psychologically, and are told that their genitals do not “match” their gender.  The second being: “disorder of sexual development”.  When our bodies are born intersex, and in-between, and not conforming to this myth of  male and female.  Both transgender and intersex people are being told they need to have their bodies “corrected” to “match” this male/female social construct of gender and sex.

If the brain has now been proven to be a mosaic of both male and female, telling those of us born transgender or intersex that are bodies are wrong, simply has to stop now.  

This gives a new valid argument to ending all genital corrective surgeries on those of us born intersex.  As well as giving new freedom to those who are labeled transgender, or  say they are  gender non-conforming.  Sex assignment surgeries will no longer be so necessary to validate our true gender, by our world’s governments.

Human Brain is a Mosaic

The Male/Female Binary Myth can Come to an End Now.

It is my hope that the male/female binary myth, and the harm it has caused so many people will finally end now.  Now that we know the brain is a Mosaic of both male and female,  this argues that the self-determination of our own personal gender has to become a human right.

As human beings, may we all be given the right to pick our own gender.  No one should be assigned at birth based on our genitals.  We should all get that chance in life to determine what what we will; be it male, female or neither.   How we act, dress, appear as, whom we become, and what surgeries or hormones  we may or may not want,  should now be up to our own Self-Determination.

Bottom line, like I have said all along:  

Gender is a personal thing and how one feels internally about themselves.  Gender is not determined by our genitals, reproductive system, hormones or chromosomes.

The Self-Determination of Gender is a Human Right.


After I wrote this blog,  above,  I had some very deep thoughts, and would like to share them here:  If biological sex is a social construct, and gender is a social construct, according to MRI science. Then in reality a brain can’t be both “female” and “male”, nor a “mosaic” of both. It is simply a human brain. And if it is simply a human brain, then why are we not all receiving the right to assign our own gender? I know it is due to the social construct of biological sex claiming that genitals create male and female. My question is not about that; it is about science proving, that the self-determination, is truly a human right. Now to make the “gender experts” at our birth realize this. Between intersex and transgender, that’s a lot of people being mis-gendered at birth!


  1. Your Brain is a Mosaic of both Male and Female   By By Stephanie Pappas, Live Science Contributor | December 1, 2015 07:47am ET
  2. Sex beyond the genitalia: The human brain mosaic  Edited by Bruce S. McEwen, The Rockefeller University, New York, NY, and approved October 23, 2015 (received for review June 4, 2015)
  3. Brains Are a Mosaic of “Male” and “Female”? It’s Called Being Human By Ann Gauger December 2, 2015 3:17 PM
  4. Sex beyond the genitalia: The human brain mosaic. Abstract: Proc Natl Acad Sci U S A. 2015 Dec 15




Gender Nonconforming, Intersex Awareness, Questions and Answers, Relationships, Self-Determination

Am I Angry I was raised a Girl?


Am I angry I was raised a girl? The true emotions are devastated, overwhelmed, and crushed. This world was not better prepared for my arrival, nor more than it is prepared for a baby born like me now. So I share my life story to change this.

I wish my parents had been instructed to give ma an androgynous name, and just leave me to be, but that did not happen. The pain is reflected in my writing at times. People assume anger. I have been told that my writing is very intense and it’s very strong. That’s why it seems like anger, I guess.
Yes, devastated, overwhelmed and crushed are three very intense emotions.

I just know one thing. I was raised the wrong gender, and not allowed to express my true gender. I never wanted surgery and still do not. My choice would have been to leave me be. I do not agree with the assignment of gender, in infants, by the appearance of genitals, and I never will. I was born with intersex traits, both in my physical body and hormonally. You can read about me here.

If I knew what it is like to be a typical woman or a typical man, I might have anger. I have no idea what that would have been like. I can’t even pretend to know today.

Only people like myself can be truly empathetic to being raised the wrong gender. They understand the emotions, devastated, overwhelmed, and crushed. This world still has problems allowing me to simply be. I am Gender Non-conforming. I am “inter gender”. I have the gender expression of a male, and on the most part the voice of a guy. But, will never know what it is like to be a typical man. Even when I appeared as female, I had no idea what that truly would feel like. At times, I enjoyed being a beautiful woman though. I am not transgender, I do not have gender dysphoria. I now equally enjoy appearing male and my body can finally be at peace doing so.

Typical people can attempt on their empathy, but because they were not born with my sort of body, they simply will never know.

Sad to say, because of this inability to know, often times friends, family and allies say things that can upset me. So I try to explain what it is like to be a person born like me.

But no, I am not angry. I am devastated, overwhelmed and crushed.

Why couldn’t they have just left me be? One simple answer. The male/female binary and a social construct that does not allow this taboo. I was born taboo, and later in life my hormones became more unacceptable as female. With transgender people emerging all around, and more intersex people gaining their right to self-determination, this world is changing finally.

If You Have Been Brutaly Broken... Nikita Gill


About Mx. Anunnaki Ray

Two diagnosis that bring in the cash $$ for surgeons, psychiatrist, and therapist: Disorders of Sex Development, and Gender Dysphoria

Poem: I was never in the wrong body. (With 5 Intersex flags from around the world.)


Cosmetic Genital Surgery, Cultural Dysphoria, Poems, Self-Determination

Poem: I was never in the wrong body. (With 5 Intersex flags from around the world.)



I was never in the wrong body

How dare this world try to tell others they are in the wrong body too.

It makes me angry.

It makes me sad.

I almost believed your lies.

For a life time you tried to fix me! 


I was born in the right body.

Don’t try to convince me,

all you therapist, doctors and surgeons that make money from this damn lie!

I don’t want your cosmetic genital surgeries! 


I was not born in the wrong body!

I caught on to this lie.

It won’t work with me! 

I am too wise.

I call it what it is:



Don’t try to convince me I am in the wrong body

and that I am

the one


“gender dysphoria” 

It is not happening! 


I am one of the lucky few that know this Earth is NOT flat! 

How dare yo make money chopping on the genitals of  intersex babies,

and those labeled transgender!  


Is any BODY that shameful?

No Body is Shameful! 


Shame on this world!


By Mx. Anunnaki Ray 

July 19th 2015 

Screen Shot 2016-07-18 at 10.08.09 PM

Above I share, four different flags that are known to represent intersex or hermaphrodite in this world.  The first one, is the “Bi-Gender” Flag, and although intersex has to do with biological sex, some have chosen to use this one to declare intersex.  The Second one, is the Australian Oii (Organization International Intersex) flag.  The Third, the Brazilian Intersex Flag.  The Fourth, the Hermaphrodite Flag, created in Germany.  Last, below is one more flag I have seen, which is also for intersex, and flown in Germany.


 Please note, some intersex do not like the label “hermaphrodite”, but some don’t mind it at all.  Also, most intersex do not like to be called a “DSD” or “Disorder of Sexual Development either.  Please always ask before using the term “hermaphrodite”, or  the phrase “DSD”.

The safe thing to say is always: “intersex”.

Here are the two symbols used to represent those born intersex:



Helpful LGBTQIA+ Definitions and Human Sexuality

All the Gender Symbols