Bridge Building, Celebrations, Intersex Awareness, Intersex People, PFLAG, Relationships

PFLAG Rockford Chapter is the 2nd to become INTERSEX Inclusive.

I am excited to announce, and celebrate that  PFLAG Rockford Illinois is the second PFLAG Chapter to responsibly include intersex.   My chapter, PFLAG of Jacksonville is the first.  This happening after they made me their Director of Gender/INTERSEX Education.  It is my goal now to help other PFLAG chapters add the “I” responsibly.

While traveling to the PFLAG’s National conference in Portland, this October 2017, I met Phyllis Gallisath the Founder and President of PFLAG Rockford Chapter.   It was one of those serendipitous moments, where we discovered ourselves sitting on the plane together during my connection in Chicago.  We introduced ourselves and quickly learned that we were both headed to the same conference!  This was the beginning of a new and amazing relationship and some very long educational discussions around intersex.

During that time Phyllis opened her heart and her mind while learning the differences between LGBTQ and the special needs of us intersex people.  While also seeing that a good number of us intersex people and parents of intersex kids, are without inclusive community and supports due also identifying as LGBTQ+.

I gave my presentation at the National Conference, as a workshop, and during it, I talk about adding the “I” responsibility to LGBTQ+.   It is very important to me that the “I” is added with full responsibility and not carelessly.  My job going to PFLAG’s National conference was in honor of all us intersex people and the parents of intersex kids.  I am very excited to be doing this work!   This would not be happening without my friends and supporters from Jacksonville PFLAG Chapter, so a huge thank you to them too!

Thank you, Phylis, for making your PFLAG Chapter the second!

 

 

22684903_10213386257348449_979086290_n
Founder & President of Rockford PFLAG Chapter: Phyllis Gallisath with me at the airport traveling to the National PFLAG Conference in Oregon, 2017.

 

18056843_1934019833495932_4868588609448113960_n
PFLAG Rockford Chapter
13439045_1790881764476407_350719373028811374_n
PFLAG Rockford Chapter
Screen Shot 2017-11-18 at 2.54.19 PM
PFLAG Rockford Chapter

You can “like” their facebook page:  PFLAG Rockford Chapter

Here is their website: PFLAG Rockford Chapter


Book Mx. Anunnaki Ray To Come Speak 


My related Blogs Regarding Intersex Inclusion: 

Intersex Inclusive PFLAG Chapters

Why I feel INTERSEX should be added to the LGBTQ rainbow

Making History! PFLAG of Jacksonville, Florida, includes INTERSEX.

Adding the “I” responsibly to LGBT

If you would like to add the “I” with responsibility, I would love to show you how, and look forward to hearing from you too:

~.V.~

Advertisements
Anunnaki Ray's Photographic Stories, Celebrations, Intersex Awareness, Self-Determination

Joey’s Gift: Self-Determination

DSL_9609

Joey is an amazing spirit, child, and has pure innocence.   At nine years old she is very clear about her gender identity and embraces their feminine side, and yet still has a great passion for sports and aspirations to become a football player!   May this world awaken gently to allow such amazing children to grow, bloom and become.   It is her hope that she changes the rules of the NFL and that they will soon allow capable women!   Look out world!  Joey is coming!

DSL_9662

Here is a message from Tiescha, Joey’s mother:

To watch a child grow into themselves is an remarkable journey to experience. Joey is an XY Intersex girl that embraces her feminine side along with naturally erasing the line in the sand of gender conformity.

She has a beautiful dream in life of seeing women join the NFL.  From an early age she found a lovely balance of enjoying fashion, dolls, baking, loving anything Hot Pink and playing football.  Any given day she walks in the house covered in dirt head to toe after hours of running slant routs, showers and puts on her Monster High PJ’s, plays with her doll house and works on her new fashion designs of Hot Pink dress with frills and sequins.  

I believe one day our Joey will help others make the dream of women in football real.  Her self-determination will take her there, not her chromosomes, or lack of testosterone production, her dream will get her there.  She believes in possibilities and we believe in her. She hopes to show other kids they can be who they are and it’s okay to be Intersex.  According to Joey it’s, okay to love football and play with Dolls, Pick flowers, and enjoy fishing, get a pedicure and play with bugs.

feather

 

Here is a Facebook support for parents of intersex kids: Intersex Support for Parents  

Untitled-1

Here is a message from Joey’s mother, Tiescha, explaining why they allowed Joey to share her aspirations with the world:

“In the past few years, Joey started to ask questions about herself that were somewhat complicated to answer as a parent. We evolved with her and started using resources online to articulate what we could not find words for. She rapidly became more self-aware and in the past year found peace with who she is. Her questions did not stop, she began to conduct her own searches online and wanted to meet other Intersex children. This lead to her wanting to help others in learning (In her words) “It’s okay to be Intersex.” As a baby Joey was subjected to surgery, she never had a say and her voice was stolen. We vowed to never allow this to happen again. She is now using her voice and has our unconditional support, love, and guidance.”

22835407_10210765945444447_1583207896_n

A picture of Joey as a baby. 

An Anonymous Message From a Parent of an intersex child: What happens with the bathrooms when she grows up?

An Anonymous letter from a parent; to National Geographic.

This message brought to you for INTERSEX Awareness Day 2017, with much gratitude to our h Seth Langner of Karmathartic

Male_and_female_sign.svgs

~.V.~

Intersex Awareness, Poems

Poem: Dear child, born like me

Precious Intersex baby

Dear Child, born like me,

I saw your blue eyes, yesterday.

Your eyes, as deep as the ocean, they touched my soul.

I could feel your insecurity, your anxiety, and happiness, to be with a person born like yourself for the first time ever.

I think it is in our eyes.

People see it in my eyes too.

What a beautiful person you are.  

Born perfect to a world that tried to erase you, like they tried to erase me.

Dear Child, born like me,

They can not erase who you are.  

Even if you do have scars.  

They can not erase you.

Your parents protect you now that they understand.

We will not allow them to hurt you no more.

Those days have to be over soon on Earth.

A new world must emerge for you,

and for others born like us.

I will be your voice, until you develop your voice.

We are no longer invisible to this world.

What a beautiful child you are.

We will change this world.

TOGETHER.

 

By Mx. Anunnaki Ray

JUNE PRIDE MONTH!  

June 25, 2017

 

This poem is dedicated to U2- PRIDE (In the Name of Love).

 

Human Rights, Intersex Awareness, Intersex Erasure, Questions and Answers, Relationships, Self-Determination, United Nations

The FEMALE PENIS and the MALE VAGINA; and explaining this to our children.

dsl_1440
My husband and I, October 2016 for Intersex Awareness Day

Our kids are proof that it is about educating only about the male/female binary, and intersex erasure, that messes up the truth around natural bodily variations existing in us humans.  You see, our children were taught that intersex bodies existed, as soon as I realized I was not a disorder and was actually born intersex instead.  Yup, they were taught about the female penis and the male vagina.  They were taught that sometimes a woman can be XY, a man can be XX, and those other chromosomal variations of human exist too, like XXY, XX/XY, XO and so many others.  Here is the United Nations’ Intersex Fact Sheet, if you have never heard of intersex before.

You see, naturally, humans come with many variations of genitals, reproductive systems, chromosomes, and hormones.  It simply is the way nature planned it all.  We are a variety of human.  It is that simple.

 

 

My kids had to actually learn that the male/female binary is what the rest of the world believes.  After learning about intersex, it blew their minds that there were just two options:  Male or Female bodies.

cropped-i-was-born-in-the-right-body2.jpg

Now, imagine teaching your children that you have been erased by this world.

That there is no box for me, few doctors that will see me even because I am taboo.  It truly sucked for them, my husband and for me.  They felt violated themselves and angry and scared for me!  We lost our home trying to chase down a doctor, across the country that would treat me. Yes, I was medically abandoned by doctors and told I was no longer patient compliant when I refused to do what they asked me to appear female.

It is hard to explain to a child that there is NO box for their type of father.   That it is the world that messed up.  That it was not my body and not my hormones that went wrong.

My children naturally never felt it was ME who had to surgically conform to this world.  I believe that most children naturally know we want our genitals the way we are born!

That is why when people asked: “how are your kids taking it?”, when I emancipated my gender, we shared that they were HAPPIER!  In the typical male/female binary world, it is devastating though.  But most assumed otherwise and thought:  “OMG! How horrible that those poor kids just lost their mother!”   Typical people also immediately assumed I would be having genital conforming surgeries too when I do not.   We can just imagine the gossip. We lost countless friends, who could not cope with it.

Everyone also assumed my husband, of twenty-eight years, would leave.  I was so disabled and sick, that he too gained his sex partner back.  I was asexual for over a decade, due to doctors giving me no choices.  We had become roommates.  So when people asked:  “How is he taking it?”, it was an insult to me!  Yes, things changed socially changed dramatically for our family,  but it was not the end of the world.  It was the beginning of a new healthier life as a couple!

dsl_1469
To see more pictures of my husband and me together, please go to: I was born perfect, and I am lovable. Thank you, United Nations.

To an intersex person, like me, and some of my intersex friends, like Tiger Devore, gender is all a “gender performance”.  A phrase that Tiger likes to use, and created to explain what I am saying here today.  So, my kids did not lose a thing. They gained a healthier parent who now had a different gender performance for the world!   I became “Vader” to them, another word for father.

I did not die when I faced certain death if I had continued on appearing female.  It is the male/female binary world that thinks things are so rigid and so concrete that the sky falls when one changes that performance.  And this is sadly why we lost so many friends and family.

The Mythical Hermaphrodite! 

Some think me to be a mythical hermaphrodite too.  Thanks to how this world brainwashed me too, all my life, I don’t feel magical, I feel like a guy with a ‘mangina’.  A word that the famous transsexual, Buck Angel, says to describe his amazing male body.  I feel like a gestational father too, words my intersex friend,  Cary G. Costello, uses to explain away us guys who can grow a baby within our wombs.  I am a “womb-man”, I was never a woman.   I am a “seahorse dad”.  For it is the seahorse father that gives birth.

So world, can you make room for the female penis too?

With us intersex people it exists  Yup, my urologist calls it a penis now that my gender has changed to male!  So that means, for forty-six years, before I appeared a male to this world I had a “female penis”.   I am the same person, yet when I appeared female they denied calling it that.   You can read this blog about the intersex ‘penis’ and all the shapes and sizes they come in:  Seven Names for the SAME thing: Penis, Phallus, Clitoris, Phalloclitoris, Micropenis, Microphallus, and Clitoromegaly.

I know many intersex girls who have a penis, and this world should not threaten cutting it off either.  Due to intersex erasure, eugenics (surgically taking away an intersex person’s fertility with non-consensual childhood surgery), and genocide (aborting us when detected before birth), most female penis’s or large clitoris get removed.  I know many transgender girls too who have a female penis.  They should not feel they have to lose theirs too, to be validated as real women.  It sickens me that transgender children are taught to believe that they are in the wrong bodies, but that is another blog.

For us intersex people, Genital integrity is all we want. Our life as our ‘true selves’ is all we want.  We simply just want the right to be LOVED the way we were born:  INTERSEX!    We simply want the human right to sexually experience OUR INTERSEX GENITALS, uncut and unharmed too.

The United Nations stands with us Intersex People now.  

The United Nations declares that intersex erasure and the torture of non-consensual childhood surgeries stop! 

It is time to allow the female penis and the male vagina and without shame.

16143193_10154972441739605_8293498791208850170_n.jpg

A meme from InterACT, that I want to give more notice to, so include it in this blog.

Male_and_female_sign.svg

Thank you for visiting my blog today!

Together we change this world, one message at a time.

~.V.~