It is impossible for me to please everyone in the intersex and transgender community. MLK Jr was NOT liked by all in his community. He moved forward anyway. I do the best I can to respect everyone.
I always say: when you have met ONE intersex person you have met ONE intersex person. Some of us are cis-gender (agree with our birth assignment) and heterosexual, and not needing nor wanting the support of the LGBTQ+ Rainbow. Yet, some of us appear LGBTQ+ and want those added supports. It is a balancing act as an educator of Gender/Intersex topics, and as an activist to try to please everyone. I have the best intentions always and am always open to suggestions. You can write me in the contact form below.
I do what I am doing mostly to save children from nonconsenting cosmetic genital surgeries and to teach the world to give ALL children the self-determination of gender.
I am not doing this for financial gain obviously. I am doing this to save children. I am not doing this for fame, to be a rock star or to be the most popular. I am doing this for children. I have made it very clear to the world that it is our self-determination that is a human right.
I have never excluded a soul, not even those who are NOT intersex. I say: Gender/intersex for a reason. Gender Identity/Biology. Both different but work together. This means I include transgender in my human rights quest.
All humans, regardless of their biological sex being endosex or intersex, have the right to self-determine their own gender identity, gender expression, and sexual orientation; and it should have NOTHING to do with their genitals, reproductive system, chromosomes, and hormones unless THEY want it to be about that.
No human being should be aborted, physically mutilated, psychiatrically violated, or coerced into having surgery due to laws, social stressors to conform, or being a psychosocial emergency. Those who conform should NOT be the only people who get privilege in society while casting out those who do not conform violently.
For those adults who do elect to have genital reassignment surgery, it is also our human right to alter our bodily appearance. However, these surgeries should never be done on non-consenting intersex children or due to the coercion of government laws claiming we have no choice but to do so to change our gender identity.
Last, I feel it is our human right to be who we are naturally, as intersex or transgender people, and to not have to abide to social rules at the cost of losing our fertility, orgasm and genital integrity. Unless of course, that is our choice to do so as a consenting adult.
I do not care how one labels themselves, or how one is diagnosed. Human Rights are Human Rights violations and this world has to stop hurting people.
I feel it is now time to create more allies, create more supportive organizations, and give a way for organizations that want to become intersex inclusive direction on how they can help us end these atrocities that intersex people face. These human rights violations are in regards to aborting healthy intersex fetuses, and ending non-consenting cosmetic corrective surgeries that are not medically necessary that are being done to intersex infants and children. Surgeries that often fail miserably, create genitals with poor sexual sensitivity. Surgeries that often assign us the wrong gender, are not reversible, take away our fertility, and sadly lead to repeat surgeries. All of this leading to psychological and physical trauma throughout our lives.
Many organizations such as PFLAG are now showing they are welcoming to intersex, and many PFLAG chapters are wanting to become more inclusive to intersex. However, adding the “I” needs to be done with great care and I personally can be contacted to make sure that this is done responsibly.
Here is my e-mail: firstname.lastname@example.org and a page dedicated just to PFLAG chapters who are ready to become intersex inclusive: Intersex Inclusive PFLAG Chapters.
Below I will talk about the reason to add the “I” to the acronyms LGBTQ+. Below I show why I am for this inclusion of intersex:
To alleviate confusion, it is important to educate that intersex is about biological sex and biology, and that the biggest problems we face are the forced assignment of gender, surgically, or hormonally. Intersex advocates, activists, and educators are trying to end our being aborted when detected in-utero and the non-consenting surgeries on infants and children. When adding the “I” to your organization it is my hope that you will also make it a part of your effort to make this a safer world for those of us born intersex. Last, it should be always educated that some intersex people do not appear LGBTQ+, nor need to.
Further, for those intersex people who do not even feel they are intersex, that is their right to not declare it and to embrace their diagnosis or conditions as not intersex. However, just because they don’t feel they have a variation of intersex, nor want LGBTQI+ support, doesn’t mean that over half of the intersex community won’t benefit from it. Which again, is a person’s right to self-determination and should always be respected.
I personally feel that it is time to include the “I”, but only if it is done with great responsibility and education about ending non-consensual genital corrective surgeries on intersex infants and children. While also guiding people to the correct organizations to support genital integrity. Here is a list that is always necessary to make sure intersex people get the right supports and are not mixed up with transgender:
Below are links that will ensure that parents in the USA, Australia, and other countries, are guided to informed and safe people that will reinforce the self-determination of gender, and that “No Body is Shameful”, and can support genital integrity:
References: Important articles and data that shows me it is time to include intersex to LGBTQ:
Quote: An independent 2015 survey of 272 people born with atypical sex characteristics has provided us with good statistical information for the first time. The survey was led by Dr. Tiffany Jones of the University of New England, and it was published in February 2016. It shows very diverse understandings of intersex bodies, sexes, and genders.
Graphics below borrowed from Demographics from Oii-Australia:
Assuming that human sexual behavior is similar to Australia globally, as you can now see, the evidence from Oii-Australia shows the need. Thus helping all infants and children be taught that they are ok being born into the bodies they are born into, regardless of how their sexual orientation, gender identity, or actual biological sex is recognized by this world when they become adults. Adults who may or may not even need marriage equality, if we grow up to appear gay or lesbian. Here is a personal blog that shares about how my family needs intersex inclusion: Are my Husband and I Gay Men Now? How We Became Sexual Minorities, Our Intersex Love Story.
Regardless of how us intersex people appear to this world when we grow up, the self-determination of gender and our genital integrity is our human right.
Here are Helpful LGBTQIA+ Definitions that help to explain Human Sexuality.
If you would like guidance on adding the “I” responsibly to your organizations’ acronyms please contact me:
Important blogs I have written that support adding the “I” to LGBTQ+:
I was born with intersex variations, here is my autobiography. My body does not comply with the rules that would put me into either the biological male box or the biological female box. So at my birth, and during my life, and up until the emancipation of my true gender, I was forced, mostly by social expectations, to conform to the female box when that was not my true gender.
As you know, at our birth they can mark either the Male box, Female box. For many of us, our true biological sex cannot be marked on most forms. Some believe we need a third box, gender-neutral, or gender X box, for those of us born intersex, gender variant, non-conforming gender, non-binary gender, or transgender.
When I started to think about this option of a third gender box, I realize that it is not as simple as adding a third box or gender X option on our birth certificates. In reality, there are some really good reasons to do this for consenting adults, and some possible really bad consequences to doing this with infants and children. Below I write about the Pros and Cons, the way I see it, and a rather radical solution is given at the end of this blog.
Before I go into the option of a third gender box though, and how I feel about this, I need to first educate you about what intersex means, since few understand about us. The below was taken from the United Nations’s Fact Sheet on Intersex:
What does ‘intersex’ mean?
Intersex people are born with sex characteristics (including genitals, gonads and chromosome patterns) that do not fit typical binary notions of male or female bodies.
Intersex is an umbrella term used to describe a wide range of natural bodily variations. In some cases, intersex traits are visible at birth while in others, they are not apparent until puberty. Some chromosomal intersex variations may not be physically apparent at all.
According to experts, between 0.05% and 1.7% of the population is born with intersex traits – the upper estimate is similar to the number of red-haired people.
Being intersex relates to biological sex characteristics, and is distinct from a person’s sexual orientation or gender identity. An intersex person may be straight, gay, lesbian, bisexual or asexual, and may identify as female, male, both or neither.
Because their bodies are seen as different, intersex children and adults are often stigmatized and subjected to multiple human rights violations, including violations of their rights to health and physical integrity, to be free from torture and ill-treatment, and to equality and non- discrimination.
To read more from the United Nations please go HERE
Now that you understand what it means to be born intersex I will share my thoughts.
Seven Possible Negative Consequences if our Government offers third gender, gender X, gender neutral, option:
My thoughts about how this could effectTransgender People:
Two Possible Solutions that could work for everyone:
In closing, I realize that the second solution is rather a radical one. However, I believe that the self-determination of gender is a human right. No matter what genitals we are born with I believe this to be true. I believe that our genital integrity is a human right too, and those cosmetic surgeries should stop in infants and children. I also believe that transgender children should never be told that they are in the wrong body nor made to believe that they need genital surgery to conform.
I will never feel that our reproductive system, genitals, hormones, and chromosomes determine our gender, and simply never will.
So, I end this blog with a question to you: Is time to Get rid of all the gender boxes?
About my collaboration with Judi Herring, M.D., who believes it is time to “(un)know gender”:
I’m a Gender/Intersex Activist, who works collaboratively with Judi Herring, MD. Our collaboration grew organically through a series of interactions, among which, Dr. Herring’s 2014 TEDx Jacksonville talk, Gender Bound: Lessons from the world between, was key. I have included the link to that, fourteen minute, TEDx below for your viewing.
In the talk, Dr. Herring delivered a message, which resonates with me, “It is time to (un)know gender.”:
“There is no question. The time is now.”
Judi Herring, M.D.
“It is time to stop cutting the genitals of infants and children just so that we can bind them into M-F boxes.
It is time to stop cutting the freedom of people, by applying labels, nonsense words – homosexual, bisexual, intersex, intersexual, transsexual, transgender – groin-focused words that bind us into in-groups and out-groups, entrenched in a state of perpetual dispute; destructive words that keep us bound, all of humanity bound in the realm of UVT – Us versus Them.
It is time that we unbind ourselves from thousands of years of certainties that place our reproductive parts, our reproductive potential at the center of who we are and how we relate.
It is time to raise our gaze from between the legs, so we can see. So we can see that it is our mind that is at the center of who we are and how we relate.
In my journey from one cell to sentience, through some magic of biology, through the wonders and the miracles of nature, my mind was embodied. I stand before you the embodiment of a mind. You are the embodiment of a mind. We are embodied minds, not bodies that happen to have minds attached to them so we can function and move and reproduce.
It is time to transcend our physical boundaries, to come together across these physical differences that divide us.
It’s time to unknow gender.”
If you would like to read more about this topic see the below links.
California the first to offer Gender Neutral as an option for Birth certificates: California 1st to Allow Gender-Neutral Birth Certificate
A Groundbreaking, Legal Case, in fighting for Third Gender in the USA:
New York City Issues Nation’s First Intersex Birth Certificate:
The nations second to have an Intersex Birth Certificate: Hida Viloria: “I have an intersex birth certificate!”.
Articles are written by Cary G. Costello, Ph.D.; Tiger Devore, Ph.D., and Morgan Carpenter:
My related Blogs:
Thank you for visiting my blog.
I am 100% alien,
until law says otherwise
I could die without my human rights
African American Slaves were called animals
Law had to finally say otherwise
The Civil Rights movement changed things
Black Lives Matter
They are human
If I die with human dignity
having full human rights
It will have to be given to me
I can not take what the government
will not give
to those of us born intersex
an empty bucket
I can not own what is not mine
an empty bucket
I will fight for my human rights
I will fight for our human rights
I will insist on it
I will declare it as mine even…..
But, I will not own it
until it is given to me
because it is an illusion to do so
an empty bucket
I could die
By Mx. Anunnaki Ray
December 14th, 2016