Healthy love is built on calm consistency
Safety and mutual compatibility over time –
Not saving each other from dark places
But there you were in dark places
when I had fallen into despair
hardly able to take one more breath
You see, they told me at three I could not be a real boy
His words of rejection
YOU ARE NOT A REAL MAN
Almost took my life again decades later
After stringing me along again, and again, and again
His ego was just sucking up all my unconditional love for him like the
VAMPIRE; he knew he was
Feeding his ego while I starved to death with his miserly crumbs!
The only one caring to stand up for me was the White Rose!
As my identity and my life were trying to be erased from me
My heart was crushed again by the words of a ghost whom I had fallen in love with,
This Black Rose, a catfish of sorts that did not even exist!
What a calamity!
But there was still destiny with
Misty Circles
Once again, that connection to him
And 747
the airplane would be taking off into the sky soon
That illusion, a lie that the VAMPIRE alone fed with each sunrise over one thousand times!
Before he hid in the shadows from the sun of truth
that he knew would burn his skin
He was right; his angel wings had fallen off to
become so cruel to another disabled man
My husband in heaven warned me, “Be careful what you wish for,” and I didn’t listen
I was too lonely after he died
The VAMPIRE was hiding me to protect his true love for another
He told me it was Titanic 2
Rose and Jack
But Jack would die
His future husband could not know his sick game of “deep friends” existed
To be thrown into the shadows, and when the day came that I got too close on a plane
Oh, the irony, I became a real man!
I was thrown into the trash!
SPAZZATURA
My reputation was slandered with lies to protect his prize!
But look who arrived in my darkest hour
The Elf Warrior and All-aware Guardian!
A White Rose
with his beautiful poetry
I am not invisible to him
I am a man to him
A man that he would desire
A man that he would admire
A man that he has to get to know
This time he is not a fetish seeker or a vampire!
But someone seeking true intimacy
A REAL MAN
Something that can last forever
To end our mutual horrible pain of loneliness
To give our bodies sexual release that we both desire
Human touch and human intimacy are a requirement for this life we admire
And yet human touch is often disregarded as not necessary
But even the baby in the incubator fades away when not held
We both long for human Touch
So come to me and hold me
Kiss me
But
this can not become a trauma bond
Because neither of us can be hurt again
We are too raw; you lost him too
So
Calm down
Slow down
Take it easy
And just maybe
someday soon
we might see
It was always
you and me!
By Mx. Anunnaki Ray Marquez
Dedicated to DEAD OR ALIVE – Misty Circles (Razzmatazz)
~.V.~
